The Deer Hunter

I'm thinking that I need to get someone to teach Eli about hunting. Today we went on a nature walk and during the course of the walk the conversation turned to hunting deer. Eli told me that we could kill some deer and sell them to Uncle Paul (a friend). I agreed. Then he told me that it was ok that we didn't have a gun with us because we could just punch them and then they would die. I told him that it didn't work that way, but he insisted that he was right. A few steps more and he said, " dad, we can always use a saw...we can always chase them with saws and kill them that way, if you don't want to punch them."

Dr. Eli

I'm so lucky! Tonight at Austin's birthday party, I stepped off of their deck and somehow became unbalanced and fell, hitting my knee on one of their pavers. Sherri brought me home and then had to leave to check out the church nurseries. Eli has become my care giver. He has checked my knee twice and has informed that there isn't any blood. He has also informed me that he is in charge while Sherri is away. My 6 year old thinks that he is Doogie Howser, MD!


My therapist (Eli) is great at pain management . He has managed to hit, fall and climb on my knee -causing me pain. Maybe he's looking for job security ...


Another lucky moment: Sherri is now home. She helped me put a knee brace on. The only problem is that she learned her bedside manner from the Spanish inquisition school of nursing. After laughing while I screamed in pain, Eli went and got me a waterproof bandaid. After all, bandaids make everything better. Eli didn't do so bad after all.

costumes are vogue for any occasion

Yesterday we were driving to my sister Lana's house to get ready for my father's memorial service.  While we were driving, Eli asked why we were going to Lana's.  I explained that we were going over there to get dressed, to which he responded that we were already dressed. I told him that we were going to get dressed up to tell Pops good-bye.  Eli thought for a second then he said' "I want to go as a cowboy. What are you going as?" I told him that I was going as a responsible adult.  Then I told him that I think Pops would have liked his cowboy outfit more than mine.

Eli, Abraham, and Chuck

Tonight while I was putting Eli to bed, I read him a Bible story - about Abraham. We talked about how God told Abraham to move far away, how he was supposed to count the stars and sand and that would be how big his family would be, and how he was an old, old man when his son was born. What caught Eli's attention was the picture of an old man (Abraham) with a shepherds staff. I explained that his staff helped him walk, helped herd his animals, and could be used for protection. Eli's take on the story: So he was like a ninja and would beat up robbers along the way...oh and Daddy, he could do flips. I kissed him good night and left him to his dreams.

As I left his room, I thought - Hmmm, Chuck Norris as Abraham...

1st soccer game

Eli did great Saterday at the soccer game. He actually played a lot more than I thought he would since he has never played before . We did have a few attention disturbances where he felt the need to flex, pose, and dance:-) but hey, soccer doesn't provide half time entertainment!

Eli's Prayer

I'm so in awe of Eli. I just went to go pray for him and he stopped me and said he wanted to pray. He asked God to place force fields around our house and our beds. He asked God to help him "be good" for his teacher and have angels tell him how to read better in reading group. He said he loved his dad, his mom, and Erica but to help Ariana to be very nice to him. He thanked God for Austin, Jon, and Jude, but to give the new baby a name. He will kiss it if its a girl. Help Jared have a good day in England and to kiss him for him. In Jesus name. Amen. I'm glad he knows already where his help comes from. That God has the ability to change people, that he names us and that God can love others for us when we can't be there.

Put me in coach...

On the way to the soccer field, I was telling Sherri about a conversation that I had with a parent in kids church. He told me how much fun Eli is going to have and that I could even help coach. At this point Eli interrupted and said ,"Dad, we already have a head coach and another one". I don't think Eli wanted me to coach...little does he know, I don't know anything about soccer and I wouldn't coach because of it!

Ladies man...

Tonight we were doing homework with Eli and we were reading words with the short o sound. Sherri was giving Eli the two words like rock and rack. Eli got rock - like rock,paper,scissors. It got to hot and hit.Eli again got it right and added hot is what you say about girls.

Cha-Cha-Cha-Chia...

Eli started Soccer tonight. When Eli came off the field , he told us that the coach told them they get to name their team. He said with a roar," we're the Chia Tigers!" (Well, that's what it sounded like to me) I started thinking about tigers with green afros - kind of like the hair bear bunch cartoon. Thank goodness he was saying cheetah tigers. That's a better way to strike fear in your opponents I think.

Honey me?

Eli's definition of "honey".  Honey - verb or adj.  When you are married and about to kiss.

My parents are special because...

Today in children's church I was teaching about the 5th commandment - honor your father and mother. I started asking the kids what made their parents different and wonderful. I got all kinds of answers from - my mom kisses me to they buy me things. Eli wanted to add his opinion about his parents. Eli's answer... My parents are spies. Now the whole world knows our secret, other kids are going to be envious, and other parents will be jealous. That's why spies seldom confess to being spies!

First day of First Grade

Friday is Eli's first day of school in the 1st grade. He has great expectations from what he will learn and do all day to the toys that he will get to play with...Lord, I hope that Mrs. Flanagan is ready and prepared for an Eli! 


When Sherri went to pick up Eli from school, his teacher met Sherri and told her that we needed to have a conference. Maybe she sees the creativity and genius that IS Eli!

Slave trade

Tonight I made Eli clean up all of his toys. As he was cleaning, he complained that I was making him into my slave. I told him that he would be my slave if I made him clean up my stuff, but since it was his stuff, it was just cleaning up. He told me that slaves have to do what you tell them to do and they get spankings if they don't do it. Hmmm...I guess he's right in a way. I could get used to being called master!

GEICO saves you money

Eli spent the day with Michelle yesterday. When she brought him home, she said that Eli told her that I was making him save for auto insurance (his words). She said that she couldn't tell by the way he was talking about it, if he was paying for mine or paying for his. With the way car insurance keeps going up, I'm glad he's planning now. If I can get him to save for college...!

Scam Artist?

My day by noon: Eli woke me up with a bloody nose this morning. when I got up to help him, he had already been in the bathroom, making it look like a crime scene with blood EVERYWHERE. Then we left to paint at the school and Eli came up covered in red marker. He was Spiderman. (btw: washable markers are NOT all that washable!) Since I didn't get all of it off, Eli said that we could just tell people that it was blood - 'cause blood is cool for boys and people might want to help him and give him money.

wedgetarians...

We are trying to change Eli's eating habits- exchanging processed food with vegetables ("A"vegetable is more than he eats now). He ate 1 mashed potato and broccoli dinosaur bite. Going to bed, he told me that he doesn't want to be a wedgetarian anymore. I asked if he meant that he didn't want to be a vegetarian. He said yes. I then said that he would only eat vegetables if he were a vegetarian. His response:" I could be the vegetarian because he tried it and didn't like it - he would eat his kind of food and I could eat mine."

On the subject of snakes...

Eli has been watching the discovery channel. Today he was telling us about the danger of black mammas. We corrected him and told him that they were black mambas. He insisted that they were called black mammas and they even have a black daddy and they get married and have baby snakes called black babies. They all hide and jump out and bite you. They even change color. So my advice: beware!

Time waits for no one!

My dad has a new home hospital bed that Eli had to check out. He asked my mom about it and she told him that Pops was sick .Eli added, "because he's old like you, and yall are going to die soon". My mom jokingly asked if I could start visiting alone.

blast from the past

When I was 5 my sisters dressed me up like Shirley Temple and told me to do a song and dance for my dad's boss who had come over for dinner. Tonight while the repair man was at our house, Eli comes out dressed in a Mickey Mouse costume, waving and saying " Hello everybody". I now have a glimpse into my father's life.
My dad was so embarrassed that he kept calling me "that neighbor kid".  He told my sisters to take "that neighbor kid" home and find James.
I just laughed at Eli :-)

Heaven or Hell

Today Eli asked me for the pool and the tent when I get old and die and go to heaven. Then he paused and added, but if you go to hell I don't want anything. It is my sincere hope and prayer that Eli get the pool, the tent, and much more!